As an INTJ I love thinking about the world as it exists and why it is the way it is. There is really nothing that is beyond examination. A few weeks ago I received a comment that contained a question that started my mulling juices flowing. That question was in regards to the ideal relationship … More The Magic of a Relationship Between Two Free Thinking Introverts
If you are a woman that feels like you have been jerked around by a committment phobe (allow me to use CP for short) only to have the CP run away at some point may have a hard time thinking of him as nice. However, bear with me for a bit and let me share … More A Commitment Phobe that Appears Selfish Could Just be too Nice!
The first thing I need to do is to say how much I dislike the word phobic in this context. To me a phobia is an irrational fear. There is nothing irrational about being afraid of marriage when there is a 50% divorce rate and a good percentage of those that are still married feel … More Some Advice to Women About Commitment Phobic Men
I received a comment a few weeks ago that really made me think. The comment related to my post on cycling behavior and the suggestion was that narcissism and commitment phobia had to be on the same spectrum because of how cold a phobic can become during the separation part of the cycle. Although I … More Being Selfish Doesn’t Make a Commitment Phobic a Narcissist
The short answer is of course it does, at least by the commonly accepted definition of a commitment phobic. For those who don’t know what I am talking about the INTJ refers to my personality type according to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. The first time I took a personality test and read what this profile … More Does my INTJ Personality Contribute to my Commitment Phobia?
I suppose the reason I am so intrigued by relationships is I have come to see them as a giant puzzle that can’t be solved. So when I come across a piece that just doesn’t even fit in the puzzle I become even more intrigued and I have to examine it. One such piece is … More If You Want a Secure Relationship try a Day to Day LAT Relationship
It seems like most of the articles you read about commitment phobic men begin with the presumption that the men are being irrational. Just using the word phobic puts it in the category of those who fear flying or public speaking or even going outside. I have never thought that was fair and prefer the … More In Defense of the Commitment Phobe
Cycling behavior is unfortunately something I have a lot of first hand experience with and it is not pleasant. The result is instability in a relationship and it has caused my girlfriends to feel like they were on an emotional roller coaster. The root cause of my behavior is the combination of being a commitment … More Why Commitment Phobics Exhibit Cycling Behavior
I am a commitment phobic. There I said it. I am not sure I like the word phobic because to be afraid of an institution that fails at least half the time doesn’t seem unreasonable. However I am often told I am one so I will accept it. I wasn’t always this way. I got … More Confessions of a Commitment Phobic and What Women Need to Know
In one month I will have been divorced 10 years. It is kind of hard to believe. I really didn’t expect to be divorced this long. As I reflect back on my life which by nature and inclination I often do I realize that I am now entering my fourth major life transition. Each one … More How it Feels to Enter my Fourth Life Transition